I think I’ve hit an all time low.
I’m going to be completely honest and say not much has changed since April, in fact, things have gotten much worse.
My denial/anxiety bubble was popped when I weighed myself and discovered I’m at the highest weight I’ve ever been, 45 lbs more than I’ve ever been, to be exact.
At this point I’m beyond surprised, I’m disappointed, embarrassed and scared. I’m disappointed and embarrassed at how I’ve allowed myself to completely spiral out of control and I’m scared at what my future holds if I don’t change my life right now.
My Weight Watchers subscription expires on June 30th, I’m going to renew it and promise myself that I actually make use of it.
I guess I just needed to put this out there, so I can finally admit it to myself and remember just how horrible this evening felt.
Tomorrow will be better, it has to be.